You won’t be able to escape the experience of a broken heart. There are thousands of ways your heart can break—a relationship breakup, being shouted at as a child, someone dear to you dying, a missed opportunity or even from your own self-hatred.
Sometimes your heart will break a little, and other times it will break a lot. Many people hold onto heartbreak for months, years and sometimes even decades with the feelings of being hurt, rejected and betrayed living inside them daily.
But just know that every time your heart breaks, it smashes through an illusion that can no longer be maintained, a fantasy that can’t be made real, an unfair projection, the realisation that what you took for granted is no longer there, or simply just how much you really loved someone. Heartbreak, although painful, can be completely renewing for yourself and your relationships.
Here are three tips to recover from heartbreak quickly:
- Give your love back to you.
In relationships we often over give our love to another person. When the breakup occurs, we can feel torn apart because a part of us is with them. So, visualise all the love and attention that you gave to them is coming back to you.
- Reflect upon the lessons you learnt in the relationship.
Have gratitude for all the good things in the relationship and get wiser about all the things that did not work. This process will help you get stronger quicker and will improve your relating skills for your next relationship.
- Love yourself more than the one that broke your heart.
We often get caught in a destructive cycle of feeling rejected, abandoned and misunderstood when we go through a breakup. This happens because we believe the other person is the only one who can love us. But the reality is that you should love yourself more than anyone else can. You should always be your own soul mate first. So, buy yourself some flowers, take a candle lit bath and take yourself out on some dates. Romance yourself until you feel bright again.
You may also find my ultimate Heartbreak Remedy Ritual healing:
- Begin in a meditation position. Place your hands on your heart and breathe deeply until you feel more present in your body.
- When you are ready, visualise all the love that flows from your heart toward your partner coming back to you. You can use your hands to call your love back to you. On an inhale, breathe your energy back into your heart. Sadness or anger may begin to come up. If it does, just exhale it out and inhale your love back in. Eventually through this process, you will have a feeling of returning back to yourself.
- Now visualise yourself surrounded by love itself. Place your hands on your knees, and as you inhale, visualise breathing love into your heart. Exhale, continuing to let go of the sadness or anger in your heart. Repeat this until your heart feels full of love
and you remember that you come from love and are surrounded by love.
- Place one hand on your heart and one hand on your belly. Inhale your sexual energy up to your heart, and then exhale it through your heart centre. Repeat this process until you feel your sexual energy filling you up and completing your heart. This may bring tears to your eyes as you supply yourself with what you partner previously did. Eventually you will smile with joy for being able to fulfil and make yourself whole again.
Always remember that every heartbreak you experience is a blessing in disguise—it will force you to return back to your truth. It will teach you many things about relationships and people and who and who not to trust. It will make you stronger in yourself, wiser in love, and more empowered to transform your relationships. Although they are never pleasant, the recovery of each heartbreak will become easier and easier, until you embrace them as a cathartic up-levelling into a more sublime experience of love.
Article by Vanya Silverten, female empowerment coach, energy healer, teacher and author of Sacred Revolution: A Woman’s Path To Love, Power & Sensual Enlightenment out now, available on Amazon